Of death and decisions

Last night, I was at the hospital primarily to get my eyes checked. Red rashes circled my eyes, though they look more like freckles than rashes. I threw up twice in the event they showed up. I wasn't really feeling good that day, and these red spots got me paranoid.

As I was preparing to be diagnosed with dengue(preparing for the bigger picture), another family was dealing with a very difficult situation. A man in a comatose after a stroke.

Apparently, the family did not have enough money, and Makati Med is not the ideal place for them to be. Since it was the nearest hospital from where "tatay" was attacked, he was immediately rushed there unmindful of the expenses they're getting in to.

The doctor said that the operating room alone would cost P130,000. And the operation would range from P350,000 to P6000,000. Three veins are out, and blood is slowly flooding his brain. As the minute goes, so does his chance for survival.

After the operation, "tatay" would get a 50/50 chance of survival. If he makes it, the best possible condition for him would be a vegetable man relying on meds and machines to pump blood in his heart. Not quite the happy ending for a P600,000 operation.

Now the family was left with the choice of letting tatay undergo the operation and take care of him at the hospital for the rest of his machine-powered life, or to simply let go and accept the fact that there is nothing they could really do about it.

Death is inevitable, but doing nothing to escape it is another thing. Questions of morality arise. Are we prolonging his life or prolonging his agony?

Sure, tatay would rather die, but his family thinks otherwise. Hindi madali ang mawalan, lalo na kapag alam mong mawawala ito ng tuluyan.

Our driver had the same experience with his lola, and he was insisting that the family should give up on tatay.

"Ganyan din lola ko eh, pinabayaan na lang namin."

I thought that was selfish, but then he said some more..

"Hiniram lang naman natin ang buhay eh. Nagamit mo na naman mabuti, pag kinukuha na, ibalik mo ng kusa. Wag yung ganyang makikipag-agawan ka pa."

And then it hit me, everything is temporary.

Last night, I went home without doing anything about my allergies. I went back to my work at 1 in the morning, and left by 2am. I drove home from Makati with some serious thoughts running inside my head.

Tatay made decision-making easier for his family. He passed this morning.

If there's anything I would like to do, and I can do them now, I would take the opportunity and do them right away. Life is too short to wait on promises and forever. Life is today, make it count!